11

I have so many things, and i think it boils down to:

I need to talk to you.

I don't think it's all need though, I believe it's also a little bit of should, and a dash of want.

I'm getting heavy nostalgia, and I can't help it.

It's sometimes pathetic, but other times acceptable. I don't think you can spend a long time cultivating a relationship only to abruptly stop it. 

There's many things I would like to say. 

There's many things I'm not going to say. 

And there's many things I won't say, not because I can't (as in 'I don't feel like it's my place to say _____"), but can't (as in "I don't know how I can correctly form the words to send my message across").

I wish you could understand, as well as me too.

I also wish I could have been more clear in how I spoke, the diction I chose, and the process of how I did it.

But time is time, and time is all around. I can't change how I said things, nor do I want to.

I really would like to talk, and if you're willing, God-willing, I would like to.

On that note, I think I'm better from my day of heavy nostalgia and constant lurking depression.

It's all good (for the most part).

On another note, I had the reoccurring dream AGAIN. This is the second time in two days.

I looked it up and it came up as something like 'repressed sexual energy/depression/lost in myself/depression'.

That's what you get when you dream about being castrated. And trying to get to a hospital, but people run into you time after time again. 

What does my dream mean?

What do my dreams mean?

My goodness, it's late and I must dream. I'm going to write about dreams in my next letter; also, about the day dream I had whilst driving down Nature's Way about a gang killing me.

I swear I'm an upbeat person.